JoeThe.Com

Announcements W/ Pics:
(Announcements and Thoughts by Joe Roberts)

8/17/06
-"80s ISUZU GEMINI TV Commerical" This is so Hot.
(JoeThe.com is not responsible for anything on any external website.)

-"OK GO Treadmill Dance" awesome treadmill dance.
(JoeThe.com is not responsible for anything on any external website.)

-"This Stinks" why is this the famous line that people say and then they follow it up with, "You want to smell it." Then why do we never believe the person and always, I mean always, take a huge whiff ourselves? It is the funniest things. Next time something Stinks horrible. Say "This Stinks, yuck it smells like poop." and then see how many people will sniff it and agree. This is great fun. Enjoy your self's and don't do anything I wouldn't do.

-THOUGHT: If your favorite color is clear, then I am sorry but you need to talk to someone about it, hopefully someone with a doctorate. Just kidding. Thanks for checking the site, Enjoy.

1/19/06
-Numa Numa Dance, what is it, I am glad you asked. You can read the article for you self on Wikipedia, but I will give you the low down.

"Numa Numa is an Internet phenomenon based on the Moldovan Romanian pop song "Dragostea Din Tei" by O-Zone. Specifically, it refers to a Flash-based video of 19-year-old American Gary Brolsma (born July 7, 1986) lip-synching the song energetically on his webcam." - Good stuff

Watch Gary Break it Down for you(Click Watch Movie).
(I do not endorse all content from any external websites)

10/31/05
-Happy Pumpkin Day. Check out the this site where you can carve pumpkins online. Check out this my pumpkin.

6/10/05
-Fold a shirt in seconds with this new and improved technique. Check it out. It really works. I can do it. Is that saying a lot...yessss.

Watch it a couple times!!!

6/8/05
-I found it. Check it out "The End of the Internet." I guess the real question is... Where does it begin? Right here, of course, at Joethe.com.

-I am not a coffee person. I like hot chocolate. But I run into a little dilemma when it is really stinking hot outside. I find myself not wanting HOT chocolate but possibly COLD chocolate.

Today I decided to give it a whirl. Let me tell you it is flat out disgusting, nasty, rotten, and straight up yuck. The packet of Hot chocolate mix doesn't mix with cold water. It only mixes if you use HOT water. That must be why they call it Hot Chocolate mix (Hence the name). Today when tried, I got this.

Nasty looking Non-Mixable Cold Chocolate.

So then I got thinking, why does it only mix with hot water? What is different about cold water. Hmm when you wash your clothes and you don't want the colors to bleed you wash in cold water. There is a correlation I know it. I just can't understand it. I also tried to mix hot tea with cold water and again nothing, no success. Again it tasted nasty as well.

Since you can't mix hot drinks with cold water, what if you tried to reverse it? Can you mix Cold Drinks with Hot water? That might not tasted to good. Hmmmm...(thinking)... ah ha what if you drink steaming hot soda. That sounds pretty nasty to me. Yuck. Well Enough for now, just take time to think about it and if you see me let me know what you think.
A piping hot glass of Pepsi (disgusting)...yes.

Hot Glass of Pepsi Mmmmm!!!

5/31/05
-Rachael and I celebrated our one year Unniversary this weekend. You may be wondering what an Unniversary is, well it is when you celebrate your anniversary on a day that isn't your real anniversary. Example Rachael and I were married on June 5, 2004. We celebrated our Unniversary a week before our official 1 year anniversary therefore it was an Unniversary and not a Anniversary.

Anyway, for our Unniversary I had two major gifts. The first gift I have been hiding for 2 years. I got my Motor Cycle License 2 years ago (without Rachael knowing) because Rachael loves Harley Davidson Bikes. I then rented a Harley V-Rod 2005 for our 1 year Unniversary. This is a picture of us on the bike.

Check it out!!!

The second gift was an accumulation of just about all of our e-mails from when we were dating. I saved them for 4 years. Waiting for the perfect opportunity to put them into a giant spiral bound book and give them to Rach as a gift. I thought that our 1 year Unniversary would be a great occasion. I also got her a couple other little things here and there. I am pretty much the man when it comes to fun surprises. If you ever need help with that kind of stuff let me know.

5/16/05
-The other day Rachael and me went with a couple of friends to Dave & Busters. We played every video game imaginable. It was lots of fun. While we were there we saw this interesting machine. It was called "The Gene Machine". It took a picture of you and your significant other and then it would combine the two of your faces to create what your supposed "Child" would look like. You pick what nationality, hair color and gender. So we picked Caucasian, blonde, and girl. Then we did it again this time picking the boy for gender. When we first got the girl picture we laughed for a long time. We said that the girl looks nothing like us. Here is what the girl looked like.

(Click to Enlarge if you dare.)

In short she pretty much looks like Curly Sue who got beat with an ugly stick. I think I am being nice when I say that.

Next, we got the print out of the boy and let me tell you everyone in the whole place lost it. The boy in short looks like a demented bowling bowl who mated with an alien. So as you can guess he is quite handsome. This is what he looks like.

(Click to Enlarge if you double dog dare.)

We are definitely going to keep this pictures and put them in our kids photo albums.

Someone at work had this done at a different place and theirs said on the bottom in fine print "Your children will not really look like this. This is only a game." My guess is one day the probably got sued because some one's kid didn't come out exactly the way the picture portrayed them. Wow, some people need extra special help.

4/18/05
-So, I went to eat at a dinner the other night at...
(Not mentioning any names just pictures of names, hehe...)

While I was there my sister asked what this picture was called on the menu under the sea food section?

(Unknown Food in Sea Food Section)

First the waitress said, "I really have no idea." Then we figured we would ask the manager because someone had to know and he said, "That is just a picture." My sister responded with, "That is good, but what is that called on the menu. I am thinking about ordering it." Manger responds with, "We don't actually serve that here. That is just a picture, but what you are going to get to eat will be 10 times better. I can promise you that." My sister says, "Ohhhh Kayy." This made a very interesting topic of discussion until our food came. Well let’s put really great menu pictures of stuff we don't even have and if someone asks we will tell them "We don't have that, but what you are going to get will be 10 times better...yesss. Sounds like a plan. I guess if you were to eat the paper menu and then try any of the food their your food would taste ten time better than that paper menu. Hmm.

Then after we got our food my dad's meal looked just like a bunny, but it was a steak. I wonder if it was really a bunny and they were merely pretending to call it a steak. Who really knows after the whole Picture in the Menu incident. Kind of like the gum pictures below. You think it is gum but it is actually steak. Ahhh Haaa. Ohh well here is a picture of the "Bunny Steak."

"Bunny Steak"

3/24/05
-Someone at work sent me this and it is hysterical. I thought everyone would like it. So I put this up on my site. Being that it is Easter I feel this is definitely appropriate. It made me laugh. Check it out.

Easter Bunny Fun

3/18/05
-Someone I know held up a piece of gum (Big Red Gum)and said to me, "You know I always thought that this stuff was steak flavored. I thought that it meant Big Red Juicy Steak. I thought who in their right mind would ever chew steak flavored gum. I realized that was it, we need to have steak flavored gum. There would be two types of gum flavors. There would be a Raw Steak Flavor and an A1 steak sauce flavor. Yesss it is brilliance. I know that it is going to go really far. Don't everyone order at once...woo woo slow down. I have to make it first. Well I figured how it would be advertised. Here goes...This is what I came up with.

Raw Steak Flavored

A1 Steak Flavored

-At my old job I decided to do the opposite of what all your parents always say, "Don't Play With Your Food." Well I did, and by the time I got around to taking pictures of what I made it was well a little moldy. This actually use to be a carrot. If you can believe it. Well this is what I got...check it out.

"Mummified Remains of a Desk Monkey"
Carrot Paper Clip Monkey

"Train Ornament with a Carrot Caboose"

-My little Irish friend MikeThe.Com (don't try this site, it doesn't really work) made me a little something for www.joethe.com. He made a portrait of me on a soda cap. Mike calls it "JoeThe.Cap" It is pretty good, I mean for a little Irish dude of a man. Well here it is.

JoeThe.Cap

11/19/04
-Today I was thinking (scary thought) and I thought how different would it be if you saw colors as not the same colors I saw. For example if I saw Yellow you saw dark green or if I saw brown you saw shades of pink. Hmmmm...I mean seriously it would be a totally different world. Think about it..(thinking)..I did and this is what I came up with.

This is the normal Pictures

This is the different color pic.

This is what it would look like if you saw colors as different colors than everyone else. It is quite interesting when you stop and think about things.

-You will never guess what I found. Stop what you are doing and take a seat first this is craziness. Ok, normally a cracker has bumps on the end of it because it was cut from a bigger cracker into smaller crackers, right.

Red Circles the ridged edge.

So you probably wondering what did I find? Well here it is. I found the END OF A CRACKER. Yes you heard it here first. Joe Roberts found the end of a cracker. I am amazing I know. here is the picture to prove it.

Circled in Red is the end of the cracker.

When I found it I was in shock just like you are right know, I am sure. Don't look at it as lucky look at it as just too good to be true. Oh, don't be sad someday you will get yours, hehe.

-I got this advertisement in the mail and it had a rooster on it and it was funny. I wanted to share it will all of you so here you go. Oh, it is some advertisement for a bank. Don't know how or why, I didn't read it I just liked the picture. I said hey I need to share that with everyone at JoeThe.Com. So Here it is. Enjoy!!!

10/01/04

-So it has been a while since I have put anything here, yeah yeah, I know. Don't have a baby beluga (whatever that means...well i just looked it up and I don't know what it means, but here is a picture of one below). Life will still go on. Very slowly, but it will still go on. So Smile just like this baby beluga does (tough isn't it). Hey, I have an idea, if you want you can smile like this baby beluga and send me the picture. I will post them on line and we can all laugh together.

-I was thinking (scary thought) what would the world be like if we had to name every part of our body? If we wanted to walk we would have to call out the name of each of our feet. For example two steps would be Pebbles & Bambam (the name of my right and left foot). Then if we wanted to wave "Hi" (don't ask me why it is in quotes I just felt like it). We would have to say Loretta, Loretta (the name of my waving hand). I know how confusing it would be if I named my foot bob and it just happened to be the same name as someone else's tongue. Every time I wanted to walk your tongue would stick out at me. Then I thought more(Even more scary), how would I get my mouth to move(I would have to call out the name of my mouth so it will move)? Once I called out the name of my mouth I would then call out the name of the object that I wanted to move. Hmmmmm, you’re probably thinking, well just so you know I am too.(picture in honor of the Flintstone)

-This a cashew fruit. I bet you didn't know that cashews grew on fruits and that the outside shell of a cashew is poisonous(yes, cashews do come in shells). The fruits only last a couple of hours after they fall from the tree. Only the natives get to enjoy this delightful treat. Well enjoy. Facts by me.

-Now you know why I don't write in here much. It confuses even the smallest of woodland creatures like this wooden elephant. I bet he doesn't know what is going on.(He looks confused doesn't he)

12/08/03
- I just realized today that, I am cute in the dark (because I cannot see myself, he he).

- I don't want anyone to forget, that I am excepting gifts this year for Christmas. I would love to receive a dollar store gift from every one of you. They are my favorite. If you need more of an idea of what to get me for Christmas read the 2nd to last Announcement on this page.

- Sabrina the teen age witch ripped a gigantic lock of her hair out at Panera Bread. It was mad ill yo.

- Sorry I haven't updated in a while. I have had a couple of crazy weeks up at school. I try to update once a week with something crazy go lucky fun.

11/13/03
- First you were like Wooo, then you were like Wooo, then you like Woooo. (Finding Nemo - Crush)

- Just keep swimming, swimming, swimming. What do we do. We swim, swim, swim. Huhh hoo hoo hoo hooo I love to swimming.(Finding Nemo - Dory)

- I would like to say Adam Hoover, the person not the vacuum, rocks. Adam is now on my website because when I told him that I mentioned him in a below Announcement, but really had nothing to do with him he was sad. So here it is Adam you’re on the site.

- I once new a man from New Ginny (BRRRIIINNGG, turn the page). He had a funny looking chinny (BRRRIIINNGG, turn the page). His name was Timmy.

11/12/03
- If your vacuum SUCKS is that a bad thing, or a good thing, can't figure that one out. If I wrote a letter to HOOVER(not Adam, the vacuum company) and told them that there vacuums SUCK with they write me a thank you letter back or a hate letter back.

- Why is the third hand on the clock called the second hand. If you look closely it is always the first hand or the third(depending how you look at it, it is all relative).

- Question: My question is do you re-test or un-test. I know that someone can take a test(exam), but how do you re-test or is it de-test. To re-test do you have to un-test your original test (take an eraser to it and erase all your previous answers). Once you have un-tested it then you can re-test it.

This is why I ask. When I get into my car I buckle my seat belt. If I forgot something I quickly un-buckle and then get what I forgot. I get into my car again and I then re-buckle.

With that logic you have to test(or buckle) first, then un-test(or un-buckle) before you can re-test(or re-buckle).

All these years teachers have had it all wrong. They never let me un-test so I could take a re-test.

Now if you de-test something then you just hate it. BUT that is a whole nother story.

11/07/03
- I am still awesome!!! Seriously!!!

- Thanks Giving is coming up. Are you sick of Turkey for this holiday? Try Turducken - duck stuffed in a chicken, stuffed in a Turkey. It's a 15 pound chicken nugget. Sounds delicious, don't believe me check it out www.turducken.com.

- Ohh yeah, so is Christmas and if anyone wants to, feel free, to get me a giant gift. You know like a winning lottery ticket, or Million dollars, or a new house, or a rubber ducky, or a rubber chicken, or a happy birthday hat (the cone kind, there the best), or a turtle, or a yo yo, or a really cool gift from the $1 store.

- I am working on the Fun Stuff, I am going to put a game up that I made and a bunch of pictures that are really fun.

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